For the last few months, I've really been trying to change up how I pray, so I don't fall into a routine and get stuck in a rut. Lately, that means I've been walking my dog while praying (yes, even in the bitter cold!) and just enjoying being outside, in the sun, mulling over the day ahead and the day behind. This week, I was praying as I usually do about my business and how I should go forward and continue on in what I'm doing, and a funny thought hit me.
When I was little, I wanted to be a million different things. Teacher. Doctor. Veterinarian. And yes, photographer). In high school I wanted a be a journalist. When I started college I wanted to go into foreign affairs. After graduating college, I honestly had no clue what I even wanted to do. Doesn't that happen to so many of us?! Isn't it crazy to think that, at the age of 18 we know enough to figure out what we want to be when we grow?
It's really absurd, if you think about it. I was 17 years old. I had no idea who I was (and I'm still learning), let alone what I wanted to be and do forever. I didn't even really have a concept of what it's like to go to work 40 hours a day, 5 days a week (if you're lucky), 52 weeks a year. Since then I've learned a lot, and now I have a clearer vision of who I want to be, and what I want to become when I grow up, and it has nothing to do with what job I will have in 10 years.
Honestly, I think we have it flipped. Why should we have to figure out our career when we're just beginning to find ourselves physically, emotionally, and spiritually? FIRST should come the spiritual, then the emotional, then everything else after that. I shouldn't be choosing who I want to become before I know who I am.
And so I say this, even though it sounds a little crazy. Right now, I love my job. I want to be a photographer, and it brings me joy. In 10 years, I honestly hope I will be in the same career. And if I'm not? That's where the growing up part comes in.
In 10 years, I want to be a better wife than I am now. I want to learn to listen to my husband and to serve him the best I possibly can.
In 10 years, I want to know my niece (which may be plural at this point!) and invest in her life.
In 10 years, I want to be growing in my faith every single day.
In 10 years, I want to be one of the most patient people you've ever met.
In 10 years, I want to know exactly who I am and be open to the change that is most definitely on the horizon.
So there it is, friends. My career does not define me. It never has, and it never will. My character, my family, my faith, what I do with my free time and the gifts God has given me...that's what defines me. And who I want to be in 10 years is a person who is leaps and bounds ahead of where I am now, but still humble enough to know that I'll always have a long way to go.
Have a happy Sunday, everyone!